


Lost Stars

by orphan_account



Category: The Voice (US) RPF
Genre: Gen, christina grimme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-14 23:47:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7196237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blake and Adam try to cope with the news that a friend has been taken from them far too soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost Stars

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in memory of Christina Grimme. Perhaps it's too soon to write a fan fic about this terrible tragedy, but as a writer (both fan fiction and original fiction) I know that words have a great healing power. All weekend this has been going through my mind as we all try to process what has happened to such an amazing talent and person.

Blake had gotten the news on Twitter and watched it unfold in snippets of news and social media. The next day seemed surreal. His mind kept flickering with images of the sweet, young girl they'd lost and the sound of her strong, clear voice. It was hard to focus on performing that night after learning that Christina was gone. Taken from them...from the family they had formed through the show. Taken from her real family and friends. And from the world.

As soon as he was done with the concert, Blake was heading back to LA. As gutting as Christina's death had been, he was focused on what he could actually help with...and that was reaching out to someone he knew was hurting very badly right now. Adam bonded as closely with his team members as he did himself, and there hadn't been a single person on the show who can't fallen for the spunky little brunette. That was part of the reason they kept finding things for her to do with the show even after her season was competition was over.

He'd exchanged texts with his best friend, but it wasn't the same as being able to see Adam face to face. All he wanted to do was know that his rock star was coping alright, and then Blake could allow himself to feel the loss. It seemed impossible to mourn it alone, and no one around him really understood the depth of the tragedy. It had taken America by surprise and there were millions of people upset by the murder...but none of the ones he was with that first day after it happened had known her the way The Voice family had.

As Saturday became Sunday, more tragedy struck in an Orlando nightclub. By the he let the hotel and got in the air, he was disgusted with the world in general. He felt angry, confused, hurt. And frustrated at being trapped in the private jet, in a bubble away from reality. But he had to wait to be where he needed to be, even if waiting was painful as hell. 

Blake didn't even stop at his place in the Hills before heading to Adam's house. Shortly after he knocked, Behati answered the door. Her normally cheerful features were pinched and he felt his stomach tighten. That couldn't be a good sign at all. 

"Hey gorgeous," He kissed her cheek. "How's he doing?"

"Not so good." The model shook her head slightly, a hand cradling her swollen belly. "He's barely eaten the last day. Judith and Michael were over last night...they couldn't seem to get through to him either. I told them you could help." 

Blake gave Adam's wife a sad smile. "Well, I hope I can. I've been really worried about him."

"I don't think anyone else is going to understand what he's going through but you," She shook her head a little, reflecting the sad smile back on her own lips. "I knew her, but not like you two. And then this whole shooting in Florida...it's been a terrible weekend. He's so stressed. I hate seeing him like this, Blake."

"Hey...it's going to be okay." He hugged her gently. "We're going to take care of him."

When Adam first told Blake he was getting married, he had been worried how it would affect their relationship. Once he got to know Behati, though, he was grateful that Adam had someone who loved him and supported him when Blake couldn't be there. The rock star was clingy, he needed the extra love and TLC that came with the unique arrangement. 

"He's in the music room." Behati stepped back and nodded. "I talked to Carson earlier, he said he was going to try to stop by tonight."

"Good." Blake nodded. "You get some rest too, okay? You've got some precious cargo there to take care of. Let me worry about Adam for awhile."

Blake watched the lovely young woman slip from the room and headed out the opposite door. He knew the interior of Adam's house by heart now and he couldn't help but think of all the happy memories they'd made there over the last five years. It hurt like hell right now, but he knew there would be more happy memories in the future. Life found a way, even if sometimes it seemed it never would again.

When he stepped into the music room, he found Adam on the couch looking sullen. It broke Blake's heard to see the shadows under his beloved rock star's eyes. He didn't say a word as he walked over and sat beside him, reaching over to entwine their fingers.

"I'm sorry," He spoke softly. "I can't imagine how shitty you must feel right now. I can't imagine this is...that this really happened. But...I don't know what to say..."

"Me either," Adam admitted, looking up at him with tired eyes. "It's just so unfair."

"It is," Blake swallowed hard, remembering the death of his brother when he was little more than a kid. It still hurt him every November, no matter how old he got or how many years Richie was gone. "It's always unfair when someone's stupid actions take someone else's life...and so young..." 

Adam nodded and rested his head against Blake's bicep. "I can't even..." 

His voice tightened and the words stopped. Blake wrapped his arms around Adam and gently pulled him into his lap. He nestled his head against the younger man's and closed his eyes. Adam's arms wrapped around his waist, body quivering against Blake's chest. 

"You don't have to," Blake murmured in his ear. 

He felt Adam nod against his neck and heard a soft sniffle. Tears flooded his own eyes as he thought about the beautiful, sweet girl The Voice family had lost. The pair clung to each other tightly for long, long minutes, the only sound in the room occasional sniffles and soft sighs. They had both had tears before this moment, but they were finally sharing the grief with one of the only people out there that would truly understand and it was freeing. 

"I love you, Big Country..." He finally whispered, his voice tired and strained. 

Blake kissed the side of Adam's face. "Love you too...just relax...I've got ya..."

The body in his arms slowly went slack and Blake was relieved to hear the soft, regular breathing coming from Adam. It was only beginning to set in how exhausted he was himself. His head found the other man's shoulder and breathed in the safe, comforting scent of his favorite person in the world. Soon he was also slipping into darkness. 

*****

"I don't think I'll ever understand why this happened." Adam finally said, finishing off his drink. 

Blake sighed in return. "I don't think it's something you should be able to understand. I just...I don't think there's words for this sort of thing. Not any that make sense. Especially not so soon." 

Several hours had passed since Blake had woken up on the couch entangled with Adam and now they sat on the patio with Behati and Carson as night fell. The boys were drinking and had been for the last hour as they talked over the news. After awhile it seemed to be going in circles, the endless wondering of why, how could someone be so evil, why someone so young and so talented. But eventually those questions dried up, finally out of everyone's system. 

"You know," Carson admitted sheepishly. "I was almost afraid you were going to quit the show, Adam. I was fully prepared to come to give you a big speech about how that wasn't what Christina would've wanted."

Blake nodded. "Well, I didn't think he'd go that far. But this is the guy that once stated he hated America...on live American television."

"Thanks guys," Adam deadpanned, the slightest smile touching his lips. 

"You do let your heart get the best of your mouth," Behati pointed out diplomatically, sipping on her water. "But we like that about you." 

"See? That's why I told you she was the best possible Mrs. Levine," Blake was only too happy to lighten the mood as much as possible. "She finds your crap likeable. That's like, the best reason to marry someone right there." 

"Mrs. Levine is going to bed," Behati rose and hugged Blake and Carson before kissing her husband. "Stay away from the pool if you drink too much." 

Blake watched his best friend's wife go and shook his head a little. "You fall into the pool one time..." 

Adam and Carson both chuckled, remembering that night fondly. Things always seemed to get a little out of hand when Carson played bartender. Blake thought maybe his friend had missed his true calling in life, but he was glad that he had because it brought them all together. Despite whatever hurt they felt now, the show had been a great part of their lives and he wasn't ready to vacate his red chair just yet. 

"Seriously, though..." Adam spoke up. "I wouldn't leave the show over that. I'm signed for two more seasons anyway, so is Blake. And...I want to be there. Grimmie is just one of so many amazing people I've met because of it. Someday it'll end, but I don't want that to be now. And definitely not for this reason. I want...I want to really enjoy this season coming up...because..."

His voice broke slightly and Blake finished for him. "...because she loved the show."

"Yeah." The rock star nodded. "So I think we should make it a great one...in her honor." 

Carson set down his drink. "We'll definitely have to do a tribute to start out the new season. It would be great if we could dedicate the season to her memory...maybe we could set up some sort of charity...I'm not sure. I just want to help somehow..."

Blake sighed. "I wish there was more we could do." 

"I already have one idea." Adam fiddled with his glass. "I'll let you guys know what happens after I work out the details."

The threesome fell silent, looking up at the stars as they slowly brightened over the Hollywood Hills. Blake sipped his drink, feeling like there was something they should say or do...but he didn't know what it was. After being able to cry and vent and mourn with his friends, he felt better...but he still hurt and he knew that wouldn't change for awhile. She might not have been next of kin or even his contestant, but she was part of the family he'd made for himself at the show. And it would be a long time before he'd be able to shake the image of the sparkle eyed, talented, sweet little girl from his mind or heart. 

"...are we all lost stars trying to light up the dark?" He was surprised to find himself singing softly. 

Adam turned to him and smiled a little. Tears glittered in his hazel eyes, the lights from the house behind them catching on the moisture and making them look like stars. "I think she did light up the dark."

"And I don't think she's lost." Carson said quietly. "As long as her music is out there and as long as Grimmie is in our hearts...she'll always be part the show, part of us."

Blake raised his drink. "To Grimmie..." 

The other two followed suit. 

"To The Voice family," Carson added. 

"To Christina..." Adam echoed, his voice firm with resolve. "A star that we won't let be lost." 

Somehow it seemed like the stars were a little brighter after they clicked glasses. Blake looked up at the heavens and a very clear picture of a young girl with dark hair came into his mind, so real it almost seemed like he was seeing her with his very own eyes.

And she was smiling.


End file.
